by James Christopher MongerSometimes, Christmas songs do more than conjure up images of blatant commercialism and forced family congeniality. Even the blackest heart cannot deny the healing power of hearing Judy Garland sing the winsomely nostalgic "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" or the joyful bounce of Chet Atkins' guitar on "Jingle Bell Rock." It's nice that these and three other holiday classics occur at the very beginning of Surviving Christmas, because any listener willing to wade through the crap that follows is indeed a fetishist. Somewhere between a terrible remix of Bing Crosby singing "Happy Holidays" -- simply laying down a hip-hop beat and playing with vocal effects is neat if you're 14 -- and a truly forgettable score from the usually reliable Randy Edelman, the not-so-ironically titled Surviving Christmas becomes an Olympic event in endurance.